"When The Lord Closes A Door, Somewhere He Opens A Window."

Two posts in a week...I must be on a roll!!

I've been thinking a lot about "doors" and "windows of opportunity" in the past few days.  I think sometimes windows of opportunity get bad rap because of the nature of how they are presented. Doors are natural points of entry & exit, beginning and ending. Windows, not so much. They are smaller, less accessible, usually only used as a point of entry/exit in forced invasions or emergencies. But it is really all in the perception...

All this to say, on Monday of this week, the door of opportunity to invest in the lives of the children at the Hands and Feet Project was abruptly closed for me. I am SO disappointed, and heart-broken that all my little toddlers are left with no closure, no explanation, and none of the structure and education that they have been flourishing in for the past five months. I can only trust that God will continue to move heaven and earth for each of them to fulfill their incredible destinies. They are even MORE precious in His sight than they are in mine.

Although the door of opportunity at Hands and Feet has been closed, the windows of opportunity to invest in children in other parts of Haiti are wide open.  There is a tremendous need for accessible education, training, and job creation to ensure sustainable growth and positive change in the country. Early Intervention/Early Childhood Education is the perfect place for me to start. But starting/running a preschool takes a significant amount of preparation and planning, and planning takes TIME. My initial plan, which has been affirmed by a dear friend and veteran overseas missionary, is to take the next 6 months in Haiti to "scout out the land". Because of the unexpected turn of events, I have decided to celebrate Christmas in the US with family, and return to Haiti in mid-January. My three main objectives beginning in January will be: 1. Develop relationships with the people I had the privilege of meeting during my first five months in Haiti. 2. Enroll in language school to learn more Kreyol (speaking fluent "toddler" Kreyol only gets me so far...) 3. Gather as much information as I can from people involved in the education system in Haiti about the requirements and standards for running a school.

This is big step of faith, and I am trusting God to continue to direct me as I walk it out. I would love to invite my friends and family to partner with me in this next adventure. Please consider joining me in one of the following ways (and this is by no means an exhaustive list...If you have other ideas, please feel free to share!)
1. Prayer - for continued safety, health, direction, divine connections, provision
2. Resources/Materials - preschool classroom supplies, developmental checklists, adaptive OT/PT equipment, teacher planning materials, curriculum, etc.
3. People - In the future I would love to be able to coordinate teams of therapists (SLP, OT, PT, Audiologists, etc.), as well as Early Childhood Educators to come on short term trips to help assess children, provide feedback for setting/reaching goals, and provide professional development for Haitian teachers.
4. Funding - The initial estimated budget is $1000/month. This includes living expenses, travel, residency paper application fees, and ministry/education costs.

I am truly thankful for the door that was opened for me to begin my adventures in Haiti...equally grateful, and tremendously excited for the windows that have subsequently been opened to allow me to stay in Haiti until this adventure is concluded.

Home Is Where The Heart Is

I've been back in the US now for almost 2 weeks, two unexpectedly early weeks. I got to have Thanksgiving with family, which was lovely. I take a hot shower every day. I go to the gym every day. I sleep in a "normal" bed...8+ hours of uninterrupted sleep EVERY night. It all feels great. And yet, at any given moment of the day, I suddenly get the urge to click my heels together three times and mutter under my breath,"There's no place like home...", hoping when I open my eyes I'll find myself in a much different (and much warmer) place. I've heard more than a few people living overseas talk about "going home to the States", which lately has struck me as an odd concept. If home is where the heart is, then shouldn't our heart be at home in the place where God has called us to be, even if it's unfamiliar, uncomfortable, and half-way around the world from what we used to know as home? All the things I mentioned earlier are often thought of as "the comforts of home", but they are not the things in which my heart finds comfort. I realized a few weeks ago that while I have talked about a few of the little miracles that have stolen my heart, I haven't introduced them to you properly. They are the reason I am homesick for Haiti:

Bekington, 2 years  11 months old

He is a natural problem-solver. Always an optimist, and a born leader. He's probably a future inventor or worship leader, or both! I miss his enthusiasm for reading books, usually first thing in the morning.

Davidson, 3 years old

He is non-verbal, but he doesn't need words to communicate his feelings. I miss his sweet smile, ear-piercing screech of excitement, and that infectious giggle when someone finds his perfect tickle spot.

D'Jolande, 3 years old

She is a jewel. Sensitive, shy, tender-hearted, dainty. I miss seeing her little face light up when I make direct eye contact with her (or when she is playing with baby dolls). 

Jameson, 22 months old

Mr. Funny Man! He makes everyone laugh. Despite having recurring asthma, he handles frequent breathing treatments like a champ and doesn't let that hinder his love of singing "Itsy, Bitsy Spider" all day (and night). I miss his full-speed-ahead bear hugs around me knees every morning.

 Jessica, 3 years old

My little butterfly. She does not walk, she "flutters about". A true fashionista. She is a little mother hen, always "fixing" people's hair and helping them however she can. I miss her endless imagination, and her endless reciting of "purple cat, purple cat, what do you see?" regardless of what book she happens to be "reading".

Luckson, 3 years old

He melts my heart! Sensitive and shy, but all boy, too. (He LOVES things that "GO".)  He is a thinker and an artist. I miss our daily walks down the driveway, when he holds my hand, points up to the sun and says, "Ky lo, li sho!" ("Kyle, it's hot!")

Mackenson, 23.5 months

Don't let that serious face fool you! He is full of joy and life and adventure. He is a walking miracle. I miss hearing him yell at the dog in English, "GO GO GO T-BONE!" (which is far cry from the hysterical meltdowns of before) and the way he so effortlessly transitions from "Hosanna" to "BINGO" and back again in the same spontaneous music set. 

Marie-Denise, 2 years 11.5 months old

She reminds me a lot of myself. Reserved, by not shy. An equal mix of silly and serious. Very studious, and creative at the same time. I miss hearing her little voice coming from the back room at bedtime, "Ky lo, mwen vle bo!" ("Kyle, I want a kiss!")

Rachelle, 2.5 years old

She's a tough cookie...or she'd like you to think she is! She is 2-going-on-15 years old.  She reminds me a bit of my niece. She likes to get dirty and play with the big kids, all while wearing pink, frilly dresses. She may be young, but she's definitely the leader of the pack. I miss her little mischievous smirk, and watching her dance with total abandon. 

"There's no place like home...there's no place like home...there's no place like home..."

Toddlers, Tiny Twins, and Transitions

This could easily be three different posts (and may indeed turn into that if it gets too long). It seems like months have passed in the 3 weeks since I last sat down to write. Such is the time warp that is living in Haiti...


School for the older kids started 2 weeks ago, and so did "preschool" in the toddler house.  We have circle time, centers, story time, recess, snack, and we follow a visual schedule. Sounds like a typical day in preschool, right? Until you throw in relatives of children (who are supposed to be in your class learning) coming to visit on the first day of school, a fellow missionary arriving with bullet wound in the shoulder that needs medical attention and prayer support, a mission team from another site who want to visit with half the kids in the house since they met on a previous trip, and a host of other inevitable and unavoidable interruptions to my "lesson plans". And somehow in the midst of all of it, the nine children in my house are flourishing...and learning! We are reading "Brown Bear, Brown Bear" and learning animals and colors in English, Kreyol, and sign language. Jameson, the youngest one in the house at 23 months, is giving the older ones a run for their money. :) He remembers the animals in the book (in English) and knows what order they go in! His favorite one to say is,"Yellow duck!" So cute!! While all this is going on, we're also tackling potty training. We had a group from Franklin, TN, a few weeks ago that brought 2 cushioned potty seats for the toddler house. This was a tremendous blessing, especially since prior to that, Tabi (one of my nannies) told me that I shouldn't try to potty train Luckson, "because he is too skinny...he will fall in!" We are chugging along, with two fully potty trained and 2 more (who may or may not be wearing bottoms on any given day) in line. Last week Marie-Denise told Tabi she didn't want to wear diapers anymore because she liked panties instead. We don't have much to choose from, but I'm happy to oblige them with whatever motivates! So goes the adventures in the toddler house...

A Baby Story - Episode 2
Just a week after I posted about the tiny twin with no name who was brought and then left in a strange series of events, we had a mother show up in the driveway with a set of even tinier twins, a boy (Wendy) and a girl (Wendia), weighing less than 6 lbs put together at 16 days old. Another tragic story, but this one has a much more hopeful continuation. Christella, the mother, is a 23 yr old widow. Her husband died from cholera in June. The twins were born 4 weeks premature and very underweight. The doctor told her she couldn't have any more children, so she didn't want to give them up, she just wanted help. "What kind of help?" we asked, expecting the usual answer of diapers and/or formula. "Just help." She replied, with a look of total exhaustion and desperation. Upon further questioning, we learned that she has no family (her mother died recently as well) and she (and the twins) had been sleeping on the floor of a friend's house, eating only sporadically and feeding the twins sugar water because the doctor told her she was anemic so she couldn't breast feed.
We quickly concluded that the best (and basically ONLY) option for keeping this family together and monitoring the health of the babies was to invite them to stay at Hands and Feet temporarily, to give Christella the support she needed to care for her babies and help the twins stabilize and gain weight. She was so exhausted, she slept the entire first 2 days she was here. We took shifts checking on her, feeding both her and the twins at regular intervals. With nothing more than a portable bassinet on the kitchen counter, a portable oxygen machine, and a bundle of baby blankets for an "NICU", we prayed it would be enough to sustain these tiny miracles. Days went by and they ate, slept, and pooped just as they should. On October 12th, the twins turned 1 month old. As of today, they weigh 3lbs 12 oz (Wendia) and 3lbs 12.5 oz (Wendy) and continue to grow and get stronger and more alert every day. Christella is a wonderful mama and I have faith that they will live long, happy, healthy lives as a family.

Time for Transition
Change is an inevitable and sometimes unexpected part of life. It doesn't get any easier as we get older, just more complicated. In August the staff here learned that Hands and Feet had chosen new leadership to oversee the day to day operations at the orphanage. Dr. Ken & Diane feel called to stay in Haiti and God has already opened new doors for them to start a surf ministry and infant rescue house. Their daughter Emi is returning to Hawaii this week to begin college. Tamara, one of the Hands and Feet interns, will be partnering with the Pierces when her 3 month term at HAF is finished. Cameron & Stacie, who have been interns here since January, have both decided to return to the States to finish school in order to have even more impact when they return to Haiti in the future. That's a pretty big chunk of our team leaving to pursue God's call for each of them individually.  It's bittersweet as we prepare for major changes individually, and at the same time welcome the new directors to Haiti next week. It reminds me a bit of the lessons learned from potty training...We have to be willing to face the unfamiliar, to balance the things we know to be true with the uncertainties of life, to celebrate small victories, and clean up and move on from the inadvertent messes we create along the way while letting go of the familiar. We can approach transition in two ways: kicking and screaming, or we can put our big girl panties on and deal with it. I choose the latter, and hopefully along the way I can teach a few more little ones to do the same.